mjj (flemmings) wrote,

"Not quite the minor outpatient procedure that they make it out to be"

Thank you all for your good wishes. The entry wasn't me, alas: I might have felt less bloody-minded if I'd had a laptop and internet access. I called my sister and asked her to post for me, thinking that she'd say This is Jeanne's sister and etc. However. Am home now with apparently fully expanded lung and a couple of holes in me from this and that.

Essentially, when they do laparoscopic surgery on gall bladders (feliciter told me the technical name for same but I currently can't recall even what painkiller they had me on), they have to lift the gall bladder out of the way, and as they were doing that with my expanded organ, the probe they were using perforated the diaphragm. Because I was blown up with air, the air all left the lung with a great whoosh and the lung collapsed. So they stuck a shunt or something in my back to drain the lung and bandaged me up and took me off to bed.

All this is quite uncomfortable enough. What they don't tell you is the screaming bloody pain in the shoulder that regularly accompanies a) being blown up with gas and b) gall bladder surgery. They had me on morphine and gravol and it didn't make a dent. Couldn't leave the bed because of drip on left side and shunt in right: *did* have to pee every two hours which meant levering self onto bedpan on screaming shoulders. (Oddly, getting sideswiped by a car in France was much less traumatic all round, but then I was younger and more knocked about and happy just to lie still looking at the ceiling. Also I fancy they put muscle relaxants in my drip. And they give you wine with your meals, a practice other nations should copy.)

So yeah, first night = season in hell until the night nurse put me on an anti-inflammatory. Which stopped the pain but not the morphine side effects, which are the same as fever's: time sense goes out the window. I'd drowse, have half remembered dreams, think odd thoughts, open my eyes, and find only five minutes had passed. And do it again, and again, and again. Grinding, that is. Worse than night flights to Japan, which to date have been my standard for deadly boredom punctuated by a cocktail of painful emotions.

So, yes, I am out and home and feeling reasonably chipper. If I feel chipperer and it stops raining tomorrow, I shall walk over to Suspect Video and get Lan Yu on a week loan. Had thought of renting it before I went in and then thought no, tempting fate that is. Yes, I had bad vibes about this surgery and always did, is why I didn't have it done nine years ago.
Tags: rl_08
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